Thesauros Literature satire Περὶ τῶν ἐν Μισθῷ συνόντων

Περὶ τῶν ἐν Μισθῷ συνόντων

Περὶ τῶν ἐν Μισθῷ συνόντων Lucian of Samosata
20 Your hopes are blasted at the words, and your proud spirit is tamed. The dream of the millionaire and landed proprietor fades away, as you gradually catch his parsimonious drift. Yet you smirk appreciation of the promise. You are to ‘consider everything as your own’; there, surely, is something solid? 'Tis a draught (did you but know it) That wets the lips, but leaves the palate dry. After an interval of embarrassment, you leave the matter to his decision, He declines the responsibility, and calls for the intervention of one of the company: let him name a sum, at once worthy of your acceptance, and not burdensome to his purse, which has so many more urgent calls upon it. ‘Sir,’ says this officious old gentleman, who has been a toady from his youth, ‘Sir, you are the luckiest manin Rome. Denyit if youcan! You have gained a privilege which many a man has longed for, and is not like to obtain at Fortune’s hands, You have been admitted to enjoy the company and share the hearth and home of the first citizen of our empire. Used aright, such a privilege will be more to you than the wealth of a Croesus or a Midas. Knowing as I do how many there are—persons of high standing—who would be glad to pay money down, merely for the honour and glory of the acquaintanceship, of being seen in his company, and ranking as his friends and intimates,—knowing this, I am at a loss for words in which to express my sense of your good fortune. You are not only to enjoy this happiness, but to be paid for enjoying it! Under the circumstances, I think we shall satisfy your most extravagant expectations, if we say ’—and he names a sum which in itself is of the smallest, quite apart from all reference to your brilliant hopes.

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